I used to think that if I wrote good songs, everyone will love it.  So whenever I write a new song, I’ll go grab one of my friends, have him/her listen, and eagerly look for enthusiastic response.  And I could tell when they didn’t like it — they wouldn’t openly come out and say it, but from their energy, facial expression, or body language, I could tell when they are just being nice and telling me that it was good.

It was a bitter disappointment for a young, naive mind.

But then, later on I realized I was completely wrong about the notion of “everyone likes it.”  There is no piece of music that is liked by everyone.  Even Mozart or the Beatles.  Ask two Beatles fans what their top 10 favorite songs are, and their lists will not be identical.

But if a song is truly impactful, it doesn’t stop there.  An impactful song elicits an emotional reaction from listeners.  Some people will think listening to the song is an engaging, pleasurable experience — it’s because the emotion they receive from the song matches an emotion they have inside.

What happens, though, when you receive a strong feeling from a song yet you really don’t have it yourself, you really can’t relate to it in anyway?

You’ll feel turned off.  You may even hate listening to the song.

I had such an experience the other day.  I was listening to Apocalyptica’s Worlds Collide album, and there’s a song called “I’m Not Jesus” featuring a chorus that goes:

I’m not Jesus
I won’t forgive

with SlipKnot/Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor singing rather gruffly.

Now, I love Apocalyptica.  I adore their fusion of cellos and metal, how the stark beauty of classically influenced melodies merge with the aggression and heaviness.  But this song really got on my nerves, because forgiveness is a value I uphold highly and listening to someone make the above proclamation over and over in a song’s chorus really grated on me.

So I went on to remove the song from my iTunes — in fact I deleted the file from my computer.  Now that’s a strong reaction to a song, wouldn’t you say?

But then I realized that others probably strongly relate to the song, just as intensely as I was turned off by it.  If I were an angst-ridden young man, feeling betrayed by church and religion, mad as hell and in no mood to forgive someone — I may really get into this song.

So you can see that an impactful song creates a strong emotional reaction in a listener.  If your listener relate to it, they’ll love it.  If they don’t, they may hate it.  Ordinary, safe, unimpactful songs don’t turn people off — they just bore them.  When it’s truly delivering something, people are more likely to have love/hate reaction.

Trying to write songs that everyone loves is a folly.  But know that strong songs elicit strong reactions — good and bad.  Keep in mind that if someone hates your song, then there’s bound to be others who will love it just as strongly as others hating it.  Haters are indicators of your potential.  You won’t get haters until you write songs of some potential.

So embrace your song’s haters, thank them for telling you that your song is impactful — and then move on to find someone who loves it.